For your enjoyment, here is a bit of humor. This is one of those "kids say the darndest things" when kids were talking about the Bible.
- In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, God got tired of creating the world so he took the Sabbath off.
- Adam and eve were created from an apple tree. Noah's wife was Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark and the animals came on in pears.
- Lot's wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the night.
- Sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a jezebel like Delilah.
- Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the apostles.
- Moses led the Jews to the Red Sea where they made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.
- The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up to Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments.
- The First Commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.
- The seventh Commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.
- The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.
- David was a Hebrew king who was skilled at playing the liar. He fought the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in biblical times.
- Solomon, one of David's sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.
- When the three wise guys from the east side arrived they found Jesus in the manager.
- Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.
- St. John the blacksmith dumped water on his head.
- Jesus enunciated the golden rule, which says to do unto others before they do one to you. he also explained a man doth not live by sweat alone.
- It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.
- The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 decibels.
- The Epistles were the wives of the Apostles.
- One of the opossums was St. Matthew who was also a taximan.
- When St. Paul cavorted to Christianity, he preached holy acrimony which is another name for marriage.
- Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony.
More Kids Say the Darndest Things from Cosby, Linkletter et al
